Monday, January 30, 2012


"If I Ran for President"...


First things first, can you only imagine what the world would be like if ran for prezzy?? I'm not so sure I'd live in the US of A anymore if I were you but that's neither here nor there...

Ok let's get started, shall we?!

1. Work weeks would only be 4 days long. Max.
Saturday, Sunday and MONDAY would be the new "weekend" because let's face it...no one likes Mondays.

2. Nationwide nap-time for everyone at 3pm.
Students, employees, presidents, CEOs, stay-at-home-moms.
At 3pm, you lay that head down and you like it.

3. Every company would instill an X% raise each year for their employees.
Need I say more? Of course, things like bringing your boss coffee and picking up lunch for her every once in a while would increase this little percentage but to each his own.

4. Fried foods...nixxed.
Heart disease is THE #1 killer IN THE WORLD. Do you know what causes it????
French fries, fried pickles, chicken nuggets, chips...yes...FRIED foods.
No more.

5. And while we're out it...sugar too.
Diabetes is right there behind heart disease. Not to mention...sugar causes inflammation in the body. Inflammation in the body causes cancer. Cancer feeds on sugar. Vicious cycle, I tell ya.

6. Cigarettes = outlawed.
Nicotine & tobacco companies would be shut down completely.
Can you imagine how many lives would be saved by the one simple movement?

7. The Bachelor would air year-round.
Twice a year is not enough. Surely there are enough crazies out there to make this happen. C'mon ABC...you know how much more money that'd bring in.

8. No driving for Asians. Period.
I love me some Asians and have a few Asian friends
of my very own but lord knows they should NOT be on the road.
Drunk or sober.

9. Insurance covers vitamins...not just drugs.
In my honest opinion, I think insurance should also cover all hair appointments...cut and color. I mean-this is what keeps me sane. It's like an anti-depressant...but not.

10. Men would carry babies.
Okay. So this might be super awkward but I'm all for it. Let's let them be fat for 9 months and see how they deal with it? Morning sickness, swollen ankles, buttons popping...take THAT, guys.

11. Each person is forced to have maid service at least twice a month.
Clean houses = happy people.
Happy people = healthy people.
Healthy people = healthy country.
Healthy country = happy country.

12. Men are required to deal with any and all car problems.
From oil changes and tire rotations, to flat tires and blown engines.
Cars were not made for women to fix and therefore, women taking their car in for a simple oil change would be unheard of.
13. All nail salons would supply their customers with complimentary booze.
No explanation necessary.

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